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Sorry it’s been a while…

But that’s par for the course, eh? Actually, I was waiting until LiveJournal was experiencing some level of stability before I got all post-happy again. I’m rather disappointed that, after paying for a permanent account however long ago, this site constantly has “attacks” that cause access issues. It’s getting kinda ridiculous.

So, I gave up on nursing… that was where we left off I believe. I had my other surgeries, on my left hand and my tubal ligation. I’m doing a lot better now, finally. I was having some pain in my left hand last night but it’s better after sleep.

Christmas with Casey was a joy, and yet I think it was a bit much for him. He seems to love all his presents! I was pretty happy with all mine as well, my parents got me the Kindle Fire! It’s the one “with special offers” but I’d never know the difference since they’re only on the screen saver. I’m just stoked they bought it for me and OMFG I love it! I wanted to post an update via laptop to get “caught up” and then start (hopefully) posting a little more frequently from there…

Dave’s brother’s girlfriend, Sara, is growing on me. When we first met her I thought she was kinda snooty, but I’m digging her now, kinda to the point of wishing he’d propose already. She got all of us some awesome gifts as well, and what she got for me made me think she’s my “soul sister” ‘cuz how did she know? Ya know?

I’m just now getting back into cleaning around the house, what with recovering from surgeries. I need to, somehow, start organizing all of our dang mail! It just piles up and piles up. I wonder if the “neat desk” would be a nice addition? Eh but I’d still want everything organized in the filing cabinet so I may as well not even bother.

Dave and I went to a party on Saturday and had a great time. It was our first time “going out” leaving Casey with his grandparents… and I didn’t get a wink of sleep that night! Boy was I one tired puppy on Sunday! Didn’t get good sleep Sunday night either so I was pretty tired Monday, too.

My back is hurting pretty bad, not sure why. It seems to have coincided with my “cycle.” Probably hormonal then.

Dave and I have been having a LOT of “downs” lately. I’m beginning to think that I just have to accept who he has become since the war and try and learn to stop snapping at him for it. He swears that he doesn’t intend to “talk down” to me, that I just take it the wrong way.

Mandie and I have drifted slightly apart. I’m kinda bothered by some things and I can’t bring myself to mention it. I think she abuses their dog, for one. I was over there a couple weeks ago and the dog was getting friendly with me, which is fine since we used to “babysit” him. I didn’t want him to pee on me, so Mandie was trying to get him upstairs, but she was kinda pulling at him a little roughly and he just went off on her, and bit her, and Casey got scared by his barking and started crying, and the whole visit he was just so upset. I don’t think he was necessarily scared of Cheech, but Cheech was getting vicious with Mandie, and I just think it’s because she treats him poorly. She said later that visit she thought they might have to get rid of him, so I told her we’d take him if that ever was the case. I feel so bad for him, being stuck there with her all day. I don’t think she hits him but I hear the way she talks to him and I don’t blame him for growling at her.

That’s the main thing bothering me, but then there’s the whole lifestyle thing. We pay for a membership to this one site during the wintertime, when we’re more “active.” The same day I paid up for 3 months, suddenly she’s back on there with a new name and a trial account. That’s the site where I first met her, actually, and she earned herself a reputation for all drama and no play. Gee, wonder where that came from? I’ve “been with” her in the past but then we started having all our fights and that stopped. I don’t want to be associated with her on the site, because I don’t want to be associated with all the drama, who does? Anyone in “the lifestyle” will tell you, drama is a no-no. Well, she told me that she wanted Dave and I to be her/their first “couple.” But then she was asking me how active we are in the lifestyle, and I gotta tell you, I took it the only way I could. The main reason her and I stopped sleeping together was because she wanted me to tell her every time I/we were with someone else. I don’t believe in “kissing and telling” so I wasn’t about to divulge that to her. She says she was worried about STDs. I understand the concern, but unfortunately it’s just a risk you have to take. Even with protection it is still possible to get something. It sucks, but it is what it is. I refused to divulge any information to her, so she refused to sleep with me anymore. So now she tells me she wants to be with us, and then asks me how active we are in the lifestyle, what am I supposed to think? I kinda laughed at her. Well, not kinda… I flat out used “lol.” Yes we had this discussion online, as most of our discussions are. She ended up saying she just isn’t familiar with the lifestyle and wanted information, to know what she’s getting herself into. When she was on the site before it was apparently only for a business maneuver. So after loling at her she refused to talk about it anymore. Understandable.

Yesterday she asked me to go mall-walking with her. Well, first of all, her and I must have different ideas of what mall-walking is, because to her it means shopping where to me it means walking briskly for exercise. Second of all, I didn’t want to leave the house because of the bitter cold. I told her “No thanks, it’s too cold” and she responded “Ya Ya” like she was saying “whatever.” I posted a status on Facebook about staying inside by the fire because there ain’t no reason to expose a child to this shit (cold). Five minutes later she posts something about stepping outside to get the mail (at 9am??) and almost freezing to death, so she was staying in. Umm yeah ok. I think she was just posting that status because she realized how inhumane I thought it would be to take an infant outside.

I think she is just obsessed with me. Wants me desperately. I have seriously referred to her as a stalker in the past. We would have these fights and I’d get these emails from someone named “Ashley Winters” wanting me to do a Passion Party at some event, back when I was still a Consultant. It was conveniently when her and I were fighting, and she conveniently knew Mandie and wanted me and Mandie to work together, and conveniently as soon as me and Mandie started talking again this “Ashley Winters” would drop back off the face of the earth. Today I was browsing around on Meetup.com and discovered a profile for someone named “Ashley” whose profile picture was Mandie in her wedding dress putting on lipstick, a picture Mandie had posted as her Facebook profile picture in the past. Mandie also apparently doesn’t Tweet but has started up more than one Twitter account and “followed” me. As soon as we’d have a falling-out I’d block that Twitter account and eventually a new one would pop up to “Follow” me. And she always “harassed” me about using Foursquare, but then joined it and tried to “Friend” me. I stopped using Foursquare altogether because she does NOT need to know my every move! It was at that point I realized that I didn’t need to use the term “stalker” lightly in reference to her anymore. I mean, she doesn’t stand outside my house or anything, but damn she follows me EVERYWHERE online! And she will sign up with new accounts wherever just to follow me. She apparently will even stoop to pretending to be someone else just to bring us back together. We are currently in our “on again” phase and I keep saying I really do WANT to be friends with her, but OMFG this is getting CREEPY! Why must she be SO desperate to be my friend? I think that like 90% of her Facebook statuses about “going out with my bestie (insert someone else’s name here)” is to TRY and make me jealous but it ain’t gonna work…

I just talked to my friend Diane for a few minutes and she said she thinks that Mandie is trying to break up me and Dave so she can have me to herself. I can’t say I doubt it…

Alright, I gotta go… I have some thinking to do… would love to hear your thoughts…

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