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Monday

I had another amazing wake-up from Brad before we got up, dressed, and headed downstairs. He wanted to get an early start to his day because he had a lot of work to get done, so I headed home.

I grabbed some coffee while the computer booted, then spent a bit of time on Facebook while waiting for my free book & paid emails to arrive. I also was sure to get Casey to do his schoolwork.

I’d told a few people about Brad saying he loved me, and that I worried I was imaging it. I decided to try and get confirmation. I sent a text saying “You said something last night” and he responded a short while later saying “Drunk me doesn’t make sense.” I asked if he even remembered what he’d said and he said “Nope.” So then I sent a text saying “It sure made sense at the time but well guess it doesn’t matter then.” But a while later, realizing it really did matter a lot, I sent “Ugh that’s a lie. It does matter. But I’ll try and forget I heard anything. No worries. Forget I mentioned it.” I do think he loves me, but I don’t think he’s ready to admit it. And I get that. With his PTSD and Alcoholism, how could he be ready for love again? But, as my mom says, I have the patience of a saint. I will still be here, in whatever way I can be, until he is ready.

I got on Black Desert for a few minutes to check things and then spent the rest of the day playing Fallout 76 with a couple friends. I varied between questing and taking over workshops. It was fun to be back on there again. We stayed up playing until I was ready for bed.

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