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Gotta love bipolar…

So… life has sucked for me since Monday morning…

I was in the Charlotte area on a business trip, because I had a Passion Party there the previous night, which did turn out very well.

I got rear-ended on my way out of the Caribou Coffee in Mooresville. My tail light is loose, but Dave can probably fix that. I did get a police report this time, just to have a record, but we’re trying to avoid getting the Insurance companies involved. There’s no sense in getting higher rates over a stupid little bump like that. The other driver was very nervous, probably hadn’t been in any accidents in her past, but we were both very friendly, and actually had some humorous conversation before the whole ordeal was over. I explained to her that I was smart enough to marry a mechanic, which we both laughed about, and that I did have whip lash, but no doctor can do anything but prescribe pain medication, so I wasn’t worried about that either.

After making the 3 hour drive home, I discovered our house had gotten broken into. That was a whole ordeal in itself, of course. For more details, check out the entry I made at my public blog, by visiting my web site.

Ever since Monday, I’ve been having trouble sleeping, trouble eating, and trouble thinking straight. I’ve been extremely depressed, which typically happens after this sort of emotional trauma. It’s one of those things where I see no end in sight for my depression, because I honestly don’t know how to cope with stress properly. After years of therapy, which I ended up quitting about a year or so ago, nobody ever thought to explain to me how to cope with stress. That’s why I gave up on therapy, because I’d just ramble on and on but never get the help I was there to get. So here I am, once again, not knowing how to cope… and knowing that if I just knew how to cope, I’d be out of the depression much faster.

Our financial situation hasn’t improved much, though I made more money in a few hours than most people make in a week. We’re waiting on our tax returns to arrive, then everything will be better. I’m still looking for a “job” but am also working my own businesses, in the hopes the latter will be more successful and profitable. Whatever way I end up getting my share of family income, that’s what I’ll accept. If it comes in the form of a “job,” I’ll know it’s only temporary, until things pick up with my own businesses. And, the harder I work at finding a “job,” typically the better things go with my own businesses. I’m hoping that continues. It’s hard for me to work a “real job” because I have a paranoia that the people I work with and/or for are out to get me fired from day one, and will not give up until I either do get fired, or just quit because of the stress. Not a very fun paranoia to have.

Well, that’s about the gist of it. Check out that entry at my public blog for more details on our home invasion.

I’m glad I kept this account, even though it’s no longer a paid account. I can really express my deepest feelings better knowing a select group of people are the only ones with access to that. Y’all should feel special.

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